• Brother
  • Started by realkevm
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
  • realkevm
  • Rotisseur
  • *
  • Karma Hunter

    • 428


    • 61
    • May 20, 2020, 10:10:25
    • Hull, UK
  • more
Brother
on: October 22, 2018, 11:07:03
Hi guys, i've had this tune kicking around since March, was wondering what you guys think to it.

Lyrics

I'll always be three days older and

you'll always be that little bit bolder

Like the time you put a coin in your eye

No wonder you're going blind

You'd always look out for me

Like the time we got caught stealing from HMV

I thought they'd call the police but

you had the shirts up your sleeve

 

Chorus

You're like the brother I never had

Except I don't go around beating up my dad

I know if I got that call late one night

I'd be there to catch your fall and make it alright

 

2nd Verse

We stayed at a strangers house

ate their food we proper wiped them out

You took all their tapes

I was left with a bellyache

Moved then to Germany

Came back to take on the queen

If I could i'd do it again



Re: Brother
Reply #1 on: October 22, 2018, 19:07:49
@realkevm This song instrumental wise is pretty good! The transitions made between chords is spot on! I really wish i could play the guitar. Lol For singing, some of the notes are kinda off but it still delivers a sense of emotion which i can still respect. The lyrics are personal and heartfelt for the brother you never had but had crazy adventures with which i find really nice as well! :)
No Price, Just Happiness.


  • realkevm
  • Rotisseur
  • *
  • Karma Hunter

    • 428


    • 61
    • May 20, 2020, 10:10:25
    • Hull, UK
  • more
Re: Brother
Reply #2 on: October 22, 2018, 19:12:23
Thanks for having a listen Waffle. Yeah my voice isn't the best in terms of singing in tune but i'm improving lol thanks, the lyrics are a true story, about a childhood friend.


Re: Brother
Reply #3 on: October 22, 2018, 19:27:45
@realkevm You'll get there man, the only way to get better at something is to do it more and more times. That's pretty cool story because it makes it more meaningful when you look back at this track as the time goes. Kinda like a stamp of your thoughts for you to remember again. :)


  • realkevm
  • Rotisseur
  • *
  • Karma Hunter

    • 428


    • 61
    • May 20, 2020, 10:10:25
    • Hull, UK
  • more
Re: Brother
Reply #4 on: October 22, 2018, 19:29:12
@realkevm You'll get there man, the only way to get better at something is to do it more and more times. That's pretty cool story because it makes it more meaningful when you look back at this track as the time goes. Kinda like a stamp of your thoughts for you to remember again. :)
It is indeed, i'm quite proud of it lyrically :)


  • MichaelA
  • Chef de Partie
  • *
  • Songwriting Addict

    • 976


    • 426
    • August 31, 2019, 23:25:43
    • Somewhere near Liverpool, UK
    • HTTPS//:soundcloud.com/Michael-a-duffy
  • more
Re: Brother
Reply #5 on: October 22, 2018, 19:51:21
Hey @realkevm , I liked the guest appearance of your little one towards the end of your video! Classic domestic bliss!  ;D

The lyric subject was interesting, and some nice chord progression. But now that you have put a few productions like this out there I think it's maybe time to challenge you a little more. It would be good, for example, if you were harder on yourself on vocal accuracy.

Instead of live videos, maybe you should produce your songs in a DAW, and then you can do multi takes of the vocal and get something out that is a lot more accurate and polished. Your songs would be better received then, which I am sure is what you want. Other production enhancements would undoubtedly follow.

Sorry to sound a bit harsh, but you won't improve if all you hear is praise without honesty.

All the best with your next steps!
If you like novels with a musical theme, why not try 'Sixth Beatle - When Music Changed The World', easily found on Amazon and Google. It is amazing, although as the author I may be biased!


  • realkevm
  • Rotisseur
  • *
  • Karma Hunter

    • 428


    • 61
    • May 20, 2020, 10:10:25
    • Hull, UK
  • more
Re: Brother
Reply #6 on: October 22, 2018, 19:55:16
No worries man, honesty is the best policy! I appreciate you having a watch, cheers :)
I only had a bit of time earlier so often just do a quick video (plus i'm trying to grow my Youtube) but you're right, a 'studio' version would sound better, especially if i'm putting my music out there for critque.

She makes quite a few appearances in my videos lol never a moments peace :)


Re: Brother
Reply #7 on: October 28, 2018, 16:51:37
HI @realkevm   ,

I've been thinking about this song quite a bit. Now, this is coming from someone who listens to and likes and supports all of your songs ... so please take this the right way :
I think you need to spend more time with that chorus. Especially the first half - it's almost like you're "throwing away" the notes. I think you have to figure out slowly and precisely what the pitches are and sing them for real. I think this song can be really good ... maybe your best one .... but I want to be able to sing along with you!  :) Everyone in the pub wants to hold up their beer and sing along with you!  :dance:

Seriously, you're getting better and better at your singing and live performances - and this song is too good to just kind of throw out that chorus.
Maybe you need to change the key. Maybe you need to sit down and just play single notes on the guitar while you match the vocal pitch. Maybe I'll play the chords on the piano and you just simply sing. I don't know exactly what works best for you but here, with this song, you should do it.

Again I mean this with great respect and if this song isn't worth it to you then disregard and carry on.
Bill
Songwriter, Keyboards, Arranger, Producer & Engineer for November Sound

November Sound is based on the Mother, Father & Son musical trio of Melissa, Bill & Will. I'm the father so anything I post will have my wife singing and/or my son playing percussion.


Re: Brother
Reply #8 on: October 29, 2018, 12:03:54
Great comment from @Bill from November Sound .....I just did give this tune a listen. You know I'm a fan and I do think this is your best work yet.

I agree about that chorus. Break it down and take serious ownership of what you are saying...because it's a very good chorus and needs to really stick hard with your listeners.
"The main thing is to have a gutsy approach....but use your head." Julia Child

 "In a world of robotic conformity, the only originality left in music is the imperfections" Eric Craptone

"Special thanks to Steve Gleason for making me who I am today." Leonard Scaper

Lenny's Tunes: http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=540680

https://soundcloud.com/vincentgleason


  • realkevm
  • Rotisseur
  • *
  • Karma Hunter

    • 428


    • 61
    • May 20, 2020, 10:10:25
    • Hull, UK
  • more
Re: Brother
Reply #9 on: October 29, 2018, 12:38:39
Thanks guys, it's good and different to get some specific feedback, it really helps because now I can focus on a particular area. I'm really glad you's like the song, it is quite an emotional and personal song for me. I'm going to have a play with the chorus, slow it down a bit maybe and see what happens.
Thanks once again :)


  • robertkc
  • Rotisseur
  • *
  • Karma Hunter

    • 459


    • 91
    • May 26, 2020, 18:13:23
    • Vancouver Island
    • https://soundcloud.com/user-564042721
  • more
Re: Brother
Reply #10 on: November 01, 2018, 20:38:07
@realkevm My interest in the lyrics - images of boys` fun and scrapes its easy to relate to -  didn`t waver despite the  vocal pitch issues you`ve already talked about. I liked the subject and feeling you put into this.
( personal aside on the vocals - I never bothered with vocal tuning post recording `til a few months ago, but have found the benefits of a gentle nudge here and there in the DAW really add up ; its more a matter of less distraction from the odd bum note, than changing singing style).
 I`d certainly listen to this song again if  you do make a more "produced"  version.

Robert


  • realkevm
  • Rotisseur
  • *
  • Karma Hunter

    • 428


    • 61
    • May 20, 2020, 10:10:25
    • Hull, UK
  • more
Re: Brother
Reply #11 on: November 02, 2018, 22:48:02
@realkevm My interest in the lyrics - images of boys` fun and scrapes its easy to relate to -  didn`t waver despite the  vocal pitch issues you`ve already talked about. I liked the subject and feeling you put into this.
( personal aside on the vocals - I never bothered with vocal tuning post recording `til a few months ago, but have found the benefits of a gentle nudge here and there in the DAW really add up ; its more a matter of less distraction from the odd bum note, than changing singing style).
 I`d certainly listen to this song again if  you do make a more "produced"  version.

Robert
Thanks Rob, i'm glad you like the song. I'm thinking about making it my next 'single' release (used loosely, I just record a produced version and self release) and playing it live again at my upcoming gigs.
I can't get my head around DAW's maybe a bit impatient or thick I use a BOSS BR 80 digital recorder.



xx
Brother

Started by thewinefestival on Songs for review

2 Replies
486 Views
Last post September 30, 2017, 15:30:50
by MichaelA
clip
The arrival of little brother

Started by MrBouzouki on The kitchen café

2 Replies
362 Views
Last post January 29, 2019, 18:56:11
by LePlongeur
xx
the brother of Paul

Started by Dutchbeat on The kitchen café

2 Replies
668 Views
Last post November 21, 2014, 18:16:33
by Dutchbeat
xx
Brother ( The Ballard of Liam Gallagher)

Started by mazzmarriott on Songs for review

1 Replies
155 Views
Last post September 14, 2019, 21:53:12
by Dutchbeat
xx
Howl (Alex Vargas) - Cover by My Brother & I

Started by HardCore88 on Songs for review

5 Replies
592 Views
Last post April 24, 2018, 14:34:52
by HardCore88