• Despite The Rain
  • Started by Clanik92
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Despite The Rain
on: June 13, 2018, 00:25:16
« Last Edit: June 13, 2018, 00:28:00 by Clanik92 »
Hello! It's been a while since I've posted something here, and I'd like to break my silence with this new work of mine!
As usual, being italian, I don't know if the lyrics are written in a proper english, so a little help in that sense is very appreciated  ;D




Re: Despite The Rain
Reply #1 on: June 13, 2018, 07:54:21
Hi Claudio, nice song and video. Your voice and songwriting style reminds me of Gary Barlow (Take That) which is obviously a compliment as he is an outstanding pop singer and writer of memorable catchy tunes.

As for the english lyrics, I have a couple of suggestions: I'd change 'make us apart' to 'tear us apart' or 'force us apart'; change 'want to bring us' to 'want to take us'; and 'no more confused' to 'no longer confused' (if  that fits..).



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Re: Despite The Rain
Reply #2 on: June 13, 2018, 10:04:15
I agree with @DanJames that this is very catchy song writing.
You did a very good job @Clanik92 !
As did many Italians before you. It is not for nothing that an absolute top vocalist like Dusty Springfield did many Italian songs throughout her very long and beautiful career.

So this is the time to do some serious talking:
Your not posting enough is selling yourself short.
If you write and post a lot, chances increase that there are real jewels among them.
3 kudos for the post. But (vicious but fair) I have to deduct 1 for not posting enough.

For good measure: the second part of my post is intended with a smile. Of course!
Great song!
Kind regards, Gus


Re: Despite The Rain
Reply #3 on: June 13, 2018, 10:35:39
Very strong and uplifting song @Clanik92 . I really like your vocal performance and how you captured and mixed it......the subtle breaths that you left in there between phrases really heighten the tension and emotion of the delivery.

I agree with @DanJames about those few lyric changes.
"The main thing is to have a gutsy approach....but use your head." Julia Child

 "In a world of robotic conformity, the only originality left in music is the imperfections" Eric Craptone

"Special thanks to Steve Gleason for making me who I am today." Leonard Scaper

Lenny's Tunes: http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=540680

https://soundcloud.com/vincentgleason


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Re: Despite The Rain
Reply #4 on: June 13, 2018, 17:40:56
@Clanik92 , very nice song, a plaesure to listen to (and to watch) this song video, you have a very nice voice  ::thumb:: ::thumb:: ::thumb:: ::thumb:: ::thumb::
me, myself, and Pie


Re: Despite The Rain
Reply #5 on: June 13, 2018, 19:49:31
It's a great song. Very good melody, structure and production.
Great piano composition, emotional... and surrounding pads too.
Do I listen an occasional voice harmonizing the main one? If so, I think the volume is definitely too low.

Congrats!

BM
No Colours for Concern.


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Re: Despite The Rain
Reply #6 on: June 13, 2018, 23:07:33
Hi! Thank you all for your comments and suggestions =)

@DanJames I like your suggestions for the lyrics, maybe only "no longer confused" seems a bit too long for the metric, I don't know, I'll try something to make it work =)

@LePlongeur Thank you very much, and you're absolutely right! I'll try to fix this problem =)

@Leonard Scaper and @Dutchbeat  Thank you very much!

@BLACK MIRROR Thanks! And yes, I've made some harmonies but now that you are telling me this thing I'll sure turn up the volume a bit!




 


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Re: Despite The Rain
Reply #7 on: June 17, 2018, 20:09:54
Great vocals and a solid song and mix is good as well so not much to offer in terms of suggestions for improvements but I have a few minor once
Personally I'd drop the sound effect (thunder etc), really don't add anything imo.
And that chorus is crying out (and I mean crying out big time!) for some powerful guitars!  ::e-guitar3::
Well done, me like!
Let man's petty nations tear themselves apart
My land's only borders lie around my heart



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