• Mrs Claus's Not So Blue Xmas! X-Rated!
  • Started by CrystalSuzy
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Mrs Claus's Not So Blue Xmas! X-Rated!
on: December 12, 2013, 06:57:30
OK...here it is...I hope you guys don't get too distracted by the awesome video that Tina made to go with this rather racy, but humorous song, set to the melody of Blue Xmas(sorry about that) My partner(Cris) and I co-wrote the song lyrics :) he's singing the male vocal and playing the guitar...I wrote and perform Mrs Claus's and the Elves lines and do any spoken parts.
Hope you enjoy and get a laugh out of this ;D ;D I know it's 6mins long, but if you can make it to the end, I think it will be worth it  :) :)
Merry Xmas to all you kitcheners on the other side of the globe



Mrs. Claus has a blue, Christmas, without him
Year after year, she?s home knitting, without him
On this one, special night, she?s a lonely, lonely wife
And that?s why, she has a blue, blue, blue, blue Christmas

She remembers, how it was, when they first met
He was so slim, trim and handsome, when they first met
They would spend, Christmas eve, with candlelight and wine
He would wink at her, with one thing on his mind

They started to smoke, a big fat one, one cold night
To her surprise, his hair and beard, suddenly turned white
Susan Dixon and Cris Greenwell
His cheeks they puffed right out, and his nose, it turned bright red
But when his belly popped his buttons, she nearly dropped down dead!

?The next thing she knew, he was up on the roof Dancing to the beat of reindeer hoofs
Then in a puff of smoke, he rose to the sky, He and his reindeer, were loaded and high?

From that night on, things were, quite different
They moved from Malibu, to the North Pole, in an instant
Then every Christmas eve of white, he?d deliver toys all night
And ever since, she?s had a blue, a lonely blue Christmas

Could it be time, for Mrs. Claus?, emancipation?
Which led her first, to consider...intoxication
As soon as she started drinking, she got right on to thinking
This wouldn?t be, such a blue, blue, blue, blue Christmas

Her lonely mood, slowly, started lifting
She began swaying, dancing, and shifting
Why should Santa, always be, the one in the limelight
It?s gonna be her turn, yes it?s her turn tonight

So then she staggered, on down, to the workshop
Kicked open the door, and came, to a full stop
?You elves are in for a treat, so pull up a front seat
This won?t be, another blue, blue, blue, blue Christmas?

So Mrs. Claus, she kicked off, her snow boots
Off came her mittens, her hat, and her snow suit
The elves sat still and stared, they were scared stiff in their chairs
Because Mrs.... Mrs. Claus, really was stripping

Then the next morning, Santa came home, to a sad sight
Mrs. Claus passed out, on the floor, all night
So every Christmas eve thereon, Santa always brings her along
:So she never, had another, blue, blue, blue Christmas:   


I'm including the SC link as well...

https://soundcloud.com/crystalsuzy/mrs-claus-not-so-blue-xmas-c


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Re: Mrs Claus's Not So Blue Xmas! X-Rated!
Reply #1 on: December 12, 2013, 20:11:13
ha that is great!!!!! those high wowooohooohoos...are you sing those yourself? that is super, you have such a great voice

hahaha, those lyrics...and that video is great!

btw that dancing aloha hawai Santa, looks just like Bin's Avantar, it is Bin, isn't it?

hahaha, i have been laughing out loud here!! Cristalsuzy (and Cris) you guys are weird and soooooo funny!!!!!!

and great vocals, super recording of the vocals

NICE ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NICE, NICE, NICE

this is one for the bad santa theme competition on soundshoots...i see you know that site already, i am going to enter some bad santa material there too

but what a blast! hohoho!
me, myself, and Pie


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Re: Mrs Claus's Not So Blue Xmas! X-Rated!
Reply #2 on: December 12, 2013, 22:21:15
Great fun Suzy! You should send this into a number of radio stations. It might give you a very quirky Christmas hit! 

A very funny video to accompany the new lyrics.

Well done!  :)


Re: Mrs Claus's Not So Blue Xmas! X-Rated!
Reply #3 on: December 13, 2013, 07:57:06
Thanks DB and WD for your kind comments...yes that's me singing those 'wowooohooohoos' and you're right DB, that does look like Bin's avatar :o
yes I know sound shoots and have put this up there, although it's more of a' BAD MRS CLAUS' song ::)

I had a lot of fun recording and producing this song, especially drunken Mrs Claus and the elves...I didn't think about anything, it all just flowed out as I went along ;D ;D I couldn't stop laughing myself in parts of it ;D ;D I guess we can be a little strange over here in Canada, at times ::)

Yes, Tina did an awesome job with the video :)

Maybe I should try sending it in to a radio WD...although what would it do to our children ???

Thanks again :) :) CS


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Re: Mrs Claus's Not So Blue Xmas! X-Rated!
Reply #4 on: December 13, 2013, 15:17:12
off topic, but Crystal suzy, how did you get your earlier video uploaded on soundshoots.....the site says one can only upload 30 MB, is that right? Do you know a trick to reduce the size of you videos???

or is itpossible to work with an emdedded link?

back on topic: back to the spendid song from Suzy and Cris


Re: Mrs Claus's Not So Blue Xmas! X-Rated!
Reply #5 on: December 14, 2013, 06:32:38
Hi DB...I never really uploaded a video onto soundshoots...I included a youtube link in my description of the song, but other than that I don't know of any was to upload a video ??? did you see a video of mine on SS?  :) :) CS


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Re: Mrs Claus's Not So Blue Xmas! X-Rated!
Reply #6 on: December 14, 2013, 11:18:28
mhhh, i am pretty sure i saw a video of you announced over there, but i could be wrong. Anyway  i send an e-mail to Oliver Soundshoots with a link of the Santa, you creep video and it is featuring now on the film page. So, it is not possible to upload a video to soundshoots but they can embed a link or make connection to a youtube video

looks neat to me, here it is:

https://www.soundshoots.com/film

the right hand screen


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Re: Mrs Claus's Not So Blue Xmas! X-Rated!
Reply #7 on: December 18, 2013, 11:20:39
HO HO HO Suzy,

very good indeed - lovely video and lyrics  :D

Blue Christmas is a great song and its always nice to hear a familiar melody - isn't it weird how those jingle bells always encapsulate Christmas - we are all programmed to accept that  ;D



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