• Shooting Waste
  • Started by Dave Bradley
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Shooting Waste
on: November 23, 2018, 16:55:01
It's been a while, hope you don't mind my stopping by with a new song after all this time.

This track has been through so many production iterations this week, but was basically written and recorded on Tuesday from a few fragments I'd had whirling around for weeks. I've totally redone the vocals and guitar solos since then, and like I say, I think this is the seventh remix. I'm looking for feedback on whether any of it is glitchy in terms of levels and balance between vocals and instrumentation, and such. I suppose any general musical feedback would be interesting too, not so fussed about comments on the lyrics, they're what they are.

https://soundcloud.com/sciencebase/shooting-waste

Shooting Waste

Stepped away from the water's edge
Though darkness surrounded me, I heard no siren call
Cleared my head and reminded myself
Without your Word, I wouldn't be here at all

Though everyone is turning everything inside out
It's way beyond a doubt, they don't need to see me fall
With every whisper, with every scream and shout
My safety net is torn, my back's against the wall

Idle eyes can't see you build your faith
Don't knock them over
Don't lead it to an empty space
Don't idolise, build up your faith
Don't tell me that it's over
Don't leave an empty place

Have you heard about the news today
There was another killing, another shooting waste
When you step back see the error of your ways
The part you played, the lives you could've saved

Have you even read the news today
Yet another killing, another shooting waste
If you'd only step back see the error of your ways
The part you played, the lives you could've saved

Climbed on up to the higher ground
Though echoes come and go, there was nowhere to fall
With open hearts we couldn't bear the sound
The separated children, the terror of it all


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Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #1 on: November 23, 2018, 17:42:24
nice  stuff here Dave,

of course I have  mixed feelings about the lyric, but I`ll leave that alone. really like the lead guitar in this, all the vocals I thought super good in this. easy song to listen too, and at the same time the lyric makes you listen. [hope that makes sense to you]



Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #2 on: November 23, 2018, 17:47:32
Thank you for listening glad you liked it. The lyrics were originally about stopping someone committing suicide, but they morphed into something else, but there's still a lot of ambiguity I hope. To be frank, I don't know what I meant by them on the whole...other than perhaps the refrain ;-) and the quasi-religious bits. I'm not at all religious but it makes for interesting discussions with friends who are when I play them a song that mentions faith and stuff, hahah.


Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #3 on: November 23, 2018, 22:57:02
I really like the emotion in your voice and the vocal effects. Really good work, topical lyrics as well


Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #4 on: November 24, 2018, 11:20:23
Thank you...no mixing nits?


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Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #5 on: November 24, 2018, 12:16:59
Hey @Dave Bradley ....I'm listening in the studio on my good headphones.....so here are a few mixing nits to chew on from my perspective.

I wanted that acoustic guitar at the start to speak a touch louder., but I'd be careful about that as I like how you build things. And then when that percussion stuff comes in on the left it caught my attention a bit hard. You might automate that down a bit at first and then let it come back up as the song builds.

My biggest nit is that the vocals feel quite a bit too hot. In these cans I'm hearing just a touch of subtle distortion in them at times. Your voice sounds really good but for me the the vocal is overpowering the song a bit.

Love the electric guitars and the way the song flows.
"The main thing is to have a gutsy approach....but use your head." Julia Child

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Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #6 on: November 24, 2018, 12:35:11
Thank you...yes, those are the kinds of things I wanted to hear. It's hard to step back and hear the nits oneself! Thanks!


Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #7 on: November 24, 2018, 15:23:12
Oh crikey, I just listened to the latest mix I did in the car...I hadn't realised...sorry folks. That triangle, far too piercing, the bass, uber-Geddy, but in a bad way, everything redone again (9th remix!)

Hope you can bear with me...off to the car again with another iteration...glad I didn't post this one in "completed", hahaha

dB/


Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #8 on: November 25, 2018, 18:53:24
@Dave Bradley  I like the way you keep things interesting by changing the dynamics . The quiet ending works  with that "lives you could have saved"  core line of the song. Just my way of hearing those last words - I wanted "saved" to be held over that closing arpeggio.
Very good guitar btw - love the electric tone.
Your vocals rise and fall in volume and intensity - no doubt that`s  effective for the lyrics; there were a few places I found the change a little abrupt- something a vocal rider  might be worth trying on.
Hope that`s helpful.

Robert


Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #9 on: November 25, 2018, 19:01:04
Many thanks.

I'll have to google "vocal rider", I realise there is some messiness in that sense...


Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #10 on: November 25, 2018, 23:42:34
Okay...I found an alternative VST Vocal Rider plugin (not the Waves one a freebie called VocRider13). Seems to take an edge off the vocals, but then I'm only experimenting now. What do you think? I couldn't work out how to pipe all the vocal stems through a send to apply the same fx, so I did it all separately on each stem...such an amateur.

https://soundcloud.com/sciencebase/shooting-waste


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Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #11 on: November 26, 2018, 13:37:43
Interesting song, I  like the chorus plus the acoustic playing. Harmonies good too. And that fat lead guitar has a great sound.

If I was asked to mix your vocals I would probably slice a bit off the top end on EQ,  just to smooth them out a bit more consistently. I was wondering if you step back a little from the mic when you go full on, it. Ignite help with that 'hot' element that @Leonard Scaper is mentioning above.

You won't know, but I used to get lots of comments on my vocals on here, both technical accuracy, plus production. These days not so much, so it is worth listening to people's suggestions. Btw I do think you have a pretty good voice a the same!  ::thumb::
If you like novels with a musical theme, why not try 'Sixth Beatle - When Music Changed The World', easily found on Amazon and Google. It is amazing, although as the author I may be biased!


Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #12 on: November 26, 2018, 17:32:31
Thanks for your thoughts. Yeah, perhaps the EQ needs a little bit less sharp on the vox. There are lots of takes in this mix and where I double the vocals or add a bit of harmony they're not always consistent. I do try...incidentally, without checking and assuming no prior knowledge based on my singing how old do you think I am?

I've been in the Kitchen since the beginning, the guys asked me to join when it first launched, so I may well have seen comments on your stuff ;-)

dB/


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Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #13 on: November 26, 2018, 18:15:20
..incidentally, without checking and assuming no prior knowledge based on my singing how old do you think I am?

dB/

Well most of us on here are only 21 @Dave Bradley. You're probably the same, I guess, so that means you started in the Kitchen when you were  maybe 16.  :ok:  ;D

But I didn't mean to suggest you didn't know what you are doing by my comments, if that's what you mean, far from it!  Sorry if you took it in a way not intended. I was just putting forward a finishing touch idea, that's all., with the best intention. But yeah, if there are lots of vocal takes now consolidated into one, as you say, well that might explain the variations  that my young 21 year old ears were picking up.

Hope you stick around the place now you are back, cheers!  ::thumb::


Re: Shooting Waste
Reply #14 on: November 26, 2018, 18:19:01
Hahahah...'m flattered that you think I'm that young...sadly, it's not the case, I'm in my early 50s. The only reason I asked is that a friend listened to the song and commented on my voice sounding young...I guess I haven't smoked enough or drank enough hard liquor.



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