• Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
  • Started by Mutrins
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  • Mutrins
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Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
on: November 19, 2018, 23:40:45
« Last Edit: November 22, 2018, 21:58:28 by Mutrins »
Hey all!

Just finishing up this track and would love to get some feedback. I'm calling it either Sometimes or Sometime I Get Lonely in Your Love. It seems very long. But I would love to get overall feedback on production, lyrics, melody, the whole nine yards. Thanks so much!
Micky

https://soundcloud.com/micky-shiloah/sometimes-11-20-2/s-2nfSb


Lyrics:
I've been here before
It's the same old same old up and down
I've been here before
Waiting for you
To come around

'Round here we don't talk about it
We don't talk about it
We don't talk about our love

Sometimes in life
You've gotta move on
Sometimes you think it's the right one
Even when it's wrong

Chorus:
Every day I keep waiting for tomorrow
When the sun will shine and no more pills to swallow
And it's good when it's good
When it's bad I've had enough
Sometimes I get lonely in your love

I pull away but you pull me back closer
I think I'm addicted to being your shoulder
And you're good when you're good
And that makes it so tough
Cuz sometimes I get lonely in your love

(And you're good when you're good
And that makes it so tough
Cuz sometimes I get lonely in your love)

And I keep telling myself
You're gonna get right back up again
You're gonna get right back up
You're gonna get right back up
You're gonna get right back up again
(I keep telling myself)
You're gonna get right back up again
(I keep telling myself)

Sometimes in life
You've gotta move on
Sometimes it feels like the right one
Even when it's wrong

Every day I keep waiting for tomorrow
When the sun will shine and no more pills to swallow
And it's good when it's good
And that makes it so tough cuz
Sometimes I get lonely in your love

Sometimes I get lonely in your love
And that makes it so tough cuz
Sometimes I get lonely in your love

I pull away but you pull me back closer
I think I'm addicted to being your shoulder
And it's good when it's good
And that makes it so tough
Cuz sometimes I get lonely in your love


  • Lane
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Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #1 on: November 19, 2018, 23:59:09
very nice work, all the verse and chorus make sense, but there is that one word for me  that throws it off just a bit

"sometimes I get lonely in YOUR love, if I lose the your and just sing that part it works better for me, but that might be just me.
good music I thought, and not at all to long. all and all, again. very nice work.    Lane


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Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #2 on: November 20, 2018, 12:23:18
I listened to this one and then went back to your catalog for overall tone comparison. This one lacks the sparkle that your others have....particularly in your vocals. That sparkle is part of your signature sound. A little EQ tweakage may be in order. Also...that kick early on seemed to catch a bit too much of my attention.

Good song, though. I do love your style.

"sometimes I get lonely in YOUR love, if I lose the your and just sing that part it works better for me, but that might be just me.

Hey @Lane ........I think that word is kind of important. Lonely in love in general is one thing but lonely in the love of a specific person takes on an entire new and more personal dimension. In fact, I might consider naming the song "Lonely In Your Love".
"The main thing is to have a gutsy approach....but use your head." Julia Child

 "In a world of robotic conformity, the only originality left in music is the imperfections" Eric Craptone

"Special thanks to Steve Gleason for making me who I am today." Leonard Scaper

Lenny's Tunes: http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=540680

https://soundcloud.com/vincentgleason


Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #3 on: November 20, 2018, 14:21:01
I love this song, very very nice, the full ending is just beautiful!   ::thumb:: By the way, you have a beautiful face also  ::heart::
also a goat understands a joke


Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #4 on: November 20, 2018, 19:44:37
@Mutrins Not too long for my enjoyment - I have no trouble listening to the pure clean sound of your vocals ( and seemless harmonies) for 31/2 minutes though I guess it could be a factor if you are pitching your work in the marketplace.
And really, your songs are very commercial- I mean that in a good way ::thumb:: ::thumb::
There are some very good dynamic changes in this song btw-  I wish more pop songs had that kind of light and shade.

Robert


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Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #5 on: November 20, 2018, 20:19:58
..I think that word is kind of important. Lonely in love in general is one thing but lonely in the love of a specific person takes on an entire new and more personal dimension. In fact, I might consider naming the song "Lonely In Your Love".




well I happen to agree with you, you want that part pointed.. I`ve been thinking of how I would say that, I`m telling you its just me...lol " good song all the way around..


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Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #6 on: November 22, 2018, 22:01:47
@Lane  Thanks, Lane! I do want to keep the word Your in, mainly because I feel like it gets my idea across the most. I appreciate your input!!

@Leonard Scaper Thanks!! I know what you mean. I didn't exactly polish everything off 100%. I put a new link to an updated version of the track. I think this might be a bit better this time around. Played a bit with the EQ and tried to give it a bit more sparkle.

@Goatrelated Thank you!!! And thank you for the compliment  :P

@robertkc thanks so much Robert!!

Updated link: https://soundcloud.com/micky-shiloah/sometimes-11-20-2/s-2nfSb


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Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #7 on: November 22, 2018, 23:03:47
Hi @Mutrins,

I really enjoyed listening to this song. Had to listen to it again :)

"Lonely In Your Love" works for me.

Later,
Stan
I'm a lyricist seeking music writers to work with.


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Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #8 on: November 23, 2018, 02:03:42
Hey Micky....this mix sounds great! Really smooth vocals with plenty of sparkle now


Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #9 on: November 23, 2018, 16:48:43
Sounds like a solid modern pop love song, but I'm not sure what "I get lonely in your love" means...but then who am I to question lyrics, I often have weird allusions but this one just doesn't parse...I get lonely without your love...dunno...what *did* you mean?


Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #10 on: November 23, 2018, 20:16:25
Hey @Mutrins .. I've been wanting to write a review for this for a while but I wasn't sure how to say it. I most often listen to radio pop music these days and I really like this. I really feel the lyrics as well. I know exactly what this means and even feel this way about life itself at times. I know people will relate to this sentiment.
Here's the thing -

good: Vocals are awesome, mixed like a duet at times even though it's only one person = very modern, happening and cool, background choir is outstanding = modern and cool

Not so good:   this may sound weird but to my ears it is an overload of coolness, that's right, too many cool things for one song.  8) Please take this the right way because I'm a fan of what you are doing.
 
 If you are still working on this song then I really think somewhere 2/3rds in you should maybe strip it down, mute some tracks (maybe almost all the instruments) and get up close and personal with the voice then build it to a high note, bring in the choir, drop the bass and drive it home  .... this is what I hear in Sam Smith, John Legend, Kesha , etc.... your music can be on the radio IMO. 
I've listened to your song many times before commenting.

If the song is done then - good show!
If you're still working it then consider making a part "less cool" ...
Bill
Songwriter, Keyboards, Arranger, Producer & Engineer for November Sound

November Sound is based on the Mother, Father & Son musical trio of Melissa, Bill & Will. I'm the father so anything I post will have my wife singing and/or my son playing percussion.


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Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #11 on: November 24, 2018, 14:53:04
this may sound weird but to my ears it is an overload of coolness, that's right, too many cool things for one song.  8)

I LOVE this place!!!!

I mean...where else can you find this kind of meaningful critique? It feels as if we are all just sitting around listening to each other throw stuff down and chiming in with whatever is on our mind about it.


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Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #12 on: November 24, 2018, 22:15:35
I think it all sounds awesome Micky! I TOTALLY get what your saying and have been there a few times in my life. I think “lonely in your love” is a perfect title. Sounds very modern and just the right amount of cool to my ears.  :D🎶👊🏻🎶


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Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #13 on: December 11, 2018, 07:15:53
Nice production. Solid lyrics and vocal layering. Well done sir!!


Re: Sometimes I Get Lonely in Your Love
Reply #14 on: December 11, 2018, 12:51:18
Hi Micky.
You have made a good song, very nice to listen and to hum. Very commercial
I also like more "lonely in your love," personalizes it more. Wonderful full ending!
I did not know that to live I had to die so many times
My Youtube channel:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAaK7mFK7fUpf1E99I1Qtow



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