True Love

Hi cooks,
I've got new song. Well it's old... But I've finally recorded it. It's about... love. And it's really different for me than ever - it's totally accoustic folk song. No loops, no electronic drums, nothing like it. I'm looking forward to your reviews.

http://https://soundcloud.com/martin_horky/true-love

True love sleeps
In my arms
Within her dreams
True love breathes
On winter window panes
Freezing the night zombies
'Cause true loves eyes
Are candlelights in the morning sky
And all the time
I know this leads me nowhere
No, these thoughts lead me nowhere
But I feel I'd like to owe it to someone
To someone...

Night has fallen
The arms of sleep are cold and cold and bare
True love heals
All the universe
That surrounds my head
As the Sun dies down
She blows away the dandelions
And all the time
I know this leads me nowhere
No, these thoughts lead me nowhere
But I feel I'd like to owe it to someone
To someone...

Go! I will be the first to comment.
Nice song, beautiful wish and lyrics.
Maybe it would be good if the chords marked the rhythm more definitely, I get the feeling that they are very open, almost to the libitum. If you could put a guitar on bass, I think it would leave the song perfectly adjusted.
The lead guitar could be a little higher in some parts?
I do not know what else to tell you. I hope I have explained me well and that you do not bother about what I have told you.

Nice tune @dr_Shad .....I like the chord changes and I love the acoustic feel of the whole production.

I might suggest that you consider tucking your vocals into the instrumentation a bit more so that they can ride that instrumental wave a bit more naturally.

I really like how you sing the "I feel......" parts.

Recorded Tim Buckley for Dutch TV.  It's likely that you never heard of the man but @Leonard Scaper certainly does.
It's not your singing, but the structure of the song and the chord changes that (warm my heart and) reminds me very strongly of Tim's 1968 period.
Needless to say that your song does something for me. I like it very much. I'll put it on a stick and take it with me in the car.
Great writing.
Kind regards, Gus

Recorded Tim Buckley for Dutch TV.

@LePlongeur .....you recorded Tim Buckley? How cool is that. Tim was a seminal singer/songwriter.

Here's one I really like from his early days:



And you are absolutely right that this @dr_Shad song is uncannily similar in style. Hope you don't mind me posting that, Martin.

Yes dr_Shad, there are no electronic drums, but there's a lot of 'electronics' going on in your recording. Like the electric guitar for instance.  I guess what I'm getting at is that this is not 'acoustic folk' in my mind.  In fact,  In my opinion,  this one actually calls out for drums (and bass, as has been suggested by @Mora..)  Of course, you don't' have to use "electronic" drums - otherwise known as "Virtual" drums.  You could get a real drummer/percussionist - but that can get costly. However, I think a song like this would do well with a a good drum track, and I can easily imagine that a virtual drum track would do a fine job.  The performance doesn't have to be made of loops per se.  For instance, if you used Logic's drummer, you could set it to "listen" to your acoustic playing and it would make some very good decisions (which of course you can edit) regarding where to put fills etc. There are many other very good products out there that sound wonderful and offer a wide range of styles and performance parameters. Yes, there is a learning curve with instruments like these to be sure, but the result can make all the difference - and many if not most people would not be able to tell the difference.

Nice chord changes and flow to this @dr_Shad . Your vocals communicate emotion well, especially in the higher register.
I agree with @M57  that somewhere along the way the slightly wandering feel of the song needs to be anchored with a drum track. It would make the spacey guitar a better fit to my way of thinking.
You`ve got a good song here !

Robert