Author Topic: Would A Dime Make A Difference  (Read 120 times)

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Offline Leonard Scaper

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Would A Dime Make A Difference
« on: August 12, 2018, 11:29:50 »
Give this new tune a listen if you have a moment or two....it's hot off the board and still really in production.

I'll be back later to post the lyrics.

 8)

Would A Dime Make A Difference
https://www.soundclick.com/html5/v4/player.cfm?songID=13766851

EDIT....Lyrics

We had a real good start
'yil you broke my heart
You played a real good game
But you never changed your name
I played my part
Until you sent me reeling

We had a real good plan
'Til you found a feel good man
Guess I was getting old
And he had a lot more gold
In those shifting sands
You lost that lovin' feeling

CHORUS
Tell me girl
Would a dime make a difference
Would a dollar make you stay
You rocked my world
But now you're kinds distant
Tell me girl
Would a dime make a difference
But how much should I pay

It was all just fine
While we walked that line
Our dates were all dutch
Yeah we didn't need much
Now I've seen the signs
You're gonna leave me lonely

We had it all goin'
We had a good glow
Like a hand in a glove
It was all about love
But now I guess
It's all about the money

CHORUS
Tell me girl
Would a dime make a difference
Would a dollar make your day
Did I rock your world
Or was I insufficient
Tell me girl
Would a dime make a difference
Or would you rather just not say

When love abounds
It makes the world go round
That's what I thought girl
'Til you got bought
Money talks
And now I'm listening
You got lucky
And I got my truck
Now while you move on
I'll sing you this song
When I look in your eyes
I see they're not glistening

CHORUS
Tell me girl
Would a dime make a difference
Would a dollar make you stay
Thought I rocked your world
But I missed the difference
Tell me girl
Would a dime make a difference
Or are you really on your way

Would a dime make a difference

« Last Edit: August 12, 2018, 12:53:55 by Leonard Scaper »
"The main thing is to have a gutsy approach....but use your head." Julia Child

"Special thanks to Steve Gleason for making me who I am today." Leonard Scaper

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/page_music.cfm?bandID=540680

Offline redmando

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Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #1 on: August 12, 2018, 11:47:08 »
Beautiful sound and recording @Leonard Scaper - you say it's still in production...I would suggest that you review some of the lyrics as I am sure some of the lines could be improved with a bit more work. It'll be a winner!
Working for the Bellmetal Banana Company

Offline Leonard Scaper

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Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #2 on: August 12, 2018, 12:56:59 »
Hey @redmondo ....thanks for listening. I'm curious as to what you are hearing in the lyrics that strikes you. I could make changes there but I like the way they work for the most part. These lyrics tell a very specific story from my somewhat distant past. ;)

Give it another listen now that I have posted them.

Offline Dutchbeat

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Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #3 on: August 12, 2018, 16:01:53 »
hi @leonard , very nice, you did it again  ::thumb:: ::thumb:: ::thumb::

would be nice to add drums to this, pretty laid back drumsor some bongos / congas (am i hearing some percussion at places?)


I lost it...ages ago

Offline LePlongeur

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Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #4 on: August 12, 2018, 16:12:46 »
Itís all far too tasteful, @Leonard Scaper !
Apart from what I normally like, the singing and the guitar, this time I like especially the percussion, the bass and the electric guitar. And the recording too. Whatís not to like?
I think I like everything.

And yes, there is a way bettering the lyrics.
The lyrics should go:
Yer ainít much
If yer ainít Dutch

In line with our normal modest way of looking at things and expressing our feelings.
Dates are from Iran and turkey, I believe. With the Lira going down quicker than the Titanic there may be business opportunities.

Great song Mr. Scaper! Really really great. Youíve warmed my heart. Thank you!

Iím warned thereís another thing posted while I was getting more ice tea. Well, iím not taking back one word.
Hi @Dutchbeat , why havenít you noticed the mistake in the lyrics.
Kind regards, Gus

Offline Bill from November Sound

Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #5 on: August 12, 2018, 17:06:46 »
Hey @Leonard Scaper it's this part:
Quote
You got lucky
And I got my truck

It really should be:
You got lucky
And I got my trucky

 :D  ;D  Ha,ha 

No, seriously though, it's really sounding great. When you read a review that says the lyrics need work.... then you start looking for something. I guess that's why I don't get too involved in the "songs for review" section.

I like the sound of your bass. The tone is great and you have some nice contrapuntal lines happening in there.

Good song!
Bill
Songwriter, Keyboards, Arranger, Producer & Engineer for November Sound

Offline Leonard Scaper

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Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #6 on: August 12, 2018, 18:18:16 »
@Dutchbeat .....I really did consider some drums this time but I settled for those few high congas. Any issues with that line about dutch dating?  ;)

@LePlongeur ....thanks, Gus.......really glad this one hit home for you.

@Bill from November Sound .....interesting that you picked up on that line. In my head that line was much more crass in nature......."You got lucky and I got ****ed. (Can I say that like that in a post....guess I just did). I settled for "I got....my truck.....which, btw, is exactly how that scenario went. Thanks for that about the bass.....I think I've got a good system now for tracking and mixing my old Gibson EB3 with tape wound strings. I was spurred on with my last tune by observations from our friend @BLACK MIRROR .

Thanks to all of you for tuning in.  I am remixing to clear up a little mud and I added another electric guitar in a few spots. :) :) :) :) :)

Is this fun....or what?

 8)

Offline Dutchbeat

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Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #7 on: August 12, 2018, 18:32:26 »
 ;D ;D ;D @Leonard Scaper .....did our automated forum...block-certain-potentially-probematic-language-filter just work? or did you self-correct.... ::) ::) ??? ;D ;D ;D ;D

i have to try....  ::) ::) ::) so....you said: "and i got ****ed"

ah  ;D ;D ;D it seems the filter is working... bloody fucking well  ::thumb:: ::thumb:: ::thumb::  OOPS  8) 8) :-X :-X :-X :-X

and, no, i don't have any problem ...with dutch dating...or going dutch  :blackgrin: :blackgrin: :blackgrin: :blackgrin: 

*edit* sorry for my language....but it was to test whether we still had the language filter on.... :-X :-X :-X :P :P :-* :-*

Offline redmando

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Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #8 on: August 12, 2018, 18:40:44 »
Hi @Leonard Scaper  - I listened again and it's growing on me even more.

Re my previous comments: I understand that your song is personal to you, but that should not prevent you from going over the lyrics to polish them a bit, without having to change the storyline in any way. I'll message you with my thoughts if you'd find it useful. If not, I'll leave well alone! I am certainly not rubbishing your lyrics, just trying to provide a little positive critique.  ::thumb::

Offline Leonard Scaper

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Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #9 on: August 12, 2018, 19:35:00 »
@redmondo .........I would truly appreciate your input on polishing these lyrics. And I absolutely agree that one should always look to what is best for the song. Message me or, heck...lay out your thoughts right here. I'm hearing a few things myself that are sticking out to me so I'm strongly considering another vocal session next weekend.

@Dutchbeat .... I self corrected.  You, otoh, did not.;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Offline Pleudoniem

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Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #10 on: August 12, 2018, 22:35:28 »
Hi @Leonard Scaper , the idea for the song is quite nice, and you have a very good voice to go with it. I agree with some of the comments above though, that the lyrics could be polished a little more. I am thinking that they could be funnelled into a story. The idea you already have offers a lot of possibilities and opportunities to do this with.

Also, the song becomes a bit repetitive when you listen to it longer. Possibly it might be an idea to add an occasional bass line that pushes it on a bit more, and drums.

It is a nice piece of work though, slightly reminiscent of Chris Rea. It just sounds as if it isn't ready yet.
Pleudoniem: composer; bass guitarist; guitarist; singer; drummer; tap-guitarist - o, and yes... erm- a bit of keys. Open for collabs.
SoundCloud Page: https://soundcloud.com/pleudoniem

Offline DanJames

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Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #11 on: August 13, 2018, 00:27:30 »
Hi @Leonard Scaper . Have you used some of these ideas before somewhere? It sounds pleasingly familiar. Great production, as always and I love how you capture the sound of your acoustic guitars. Vocals and percussion sound great too.

My only constructive feedback would be that the overall vibe of the chords/melody is quite jolly and upbeat whereas the lyrics are rather sad and bitter- that contrast doesn't quite work for me on this occasion (although I'm often guilty of doing that too...) Dan

Offline Bill from November Sound

Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #12 on: August 13, 2018, 01:13:16 »
Hey @Leonard Scaper .... I was thinking. I never hear any "mud" whatsoever in your productions but you're talking about going back to the mix to clear up some mud. Your mix sounds very, very clear to me.

Slightly off topic I guess but I'm thinking I need to add "mud" into mine.  :)  I've been referencing alongside other tracks and I'm missing those low-mids .... so yeah, how do you know how much of that is required for fullness and warmth? I want to get that fuller sound the right way.

Offline Leonard Scaper

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Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #13 on: August 13, 2018, 02:13:29 »
@Pleudoniem .....you're right, I think, about the repetitive nature of the song. In all honesty, I'm not very good at writing in lots of melodic changes. I kind of let songs form themselves. Yeah...the lyrics. I'll be taking a look at them but there are things in there that I needed to say even though they sounded a bit awkward.

@DanJames .....chuckling.....most of my material is somewhat recycled but this one is definitely not....lyrically at least. It is the continuing sage of my ex-wives series. I will definitely say that my melodies all tend to sound pretty similar.

@Bill from November Sound ....interesting. I'll be posting a mix in the morning that has a bit of 200 - 400 Hz cleaned out. I think it's subtle but I'll be very curious as to how it sounds to you. This new mix also has a new electric guitar part that I really like. That range is so hard to get right. I had this song up on a single studio monitor in mono during the day....LOUD. I listened from outside the studio and made subtle EQ adjustments as I heard things that bothered me....mostly in that low end.

Offline LePlongeur

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Re: Would A Dime Make A Difference
« Reply #14 on: August 13, 2018, 06:41:35 »
I think we should promise ourselves and each other to try and stay away from the slightly managerial blah blah.
Especially when the salary for the coming year is debated, and after a whole year of compliments and shoulder patting, a whole new jargon is introduced. And the most common thought is that repetition makes all nonsense true.

You've got to focus more on the.........
You've got to do a little less socialising, while during the year there were special evenings to polish up the teamspirit
Show more commitment or whatever's the word in English

All this is in line with:
- work harder
- sing higher
to name a few.

All this doesn't work because it's vague and most of all not measurable.
They were restless or sleepless in the running up to these conversations. Because against their non-measurable arguments, my replies were very measurable. I wasn't the one in the broom cupboard with Barbara after all.

This is no jab at @redmando , but if I were addressed with a suggestion that went like that, I wouldn't know where to start or what to do.
I'd feel I were in the 'jump higher' part of the show.

My opinion would be that we would have try and avoid putting each other through performance appraisal (says google translate) talks like these.
I know it's only an opinion, but it's mine.
The song is not alas.
Kind regards, Gus

edit: Typo
« Last Edit: August 13, 2018, 08:30:20 by LePlongeur »


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